We are all used to seeing this sex scene in Hollywood movies or pornography; the women always seem to have orgasms like a breeze. Well, the reality is, most women don't reach orgasm so easily. According to Webmd.com, about 10% of women have never had an orgasm, either with a partner or just musterbation, and there is only 10% of women can climax easily. Most women are in the remaining 80%. Many women think they are not normal because they cannot climax solely through penetrative thrusts. What they did not know is that most women can not, especially without the extra help from sex toys, hands or tongue, etc. So if you are one of 80% that can have clitoral climax but have trouble having an orgasm from vaginal sex, you are just normal and should not stress yourself out thinking something is wrong with you. NOTHING IS WRONG WITH YOU, neither with YOUR PARTNER.
It can be very frustrating for a woman not being able to have an orgasm during sex. Today I am going to share six tips to improve female orgasmic possibilities.
Self-knowledge is the kickoff start
It might sound odd but it is very difficult to get to know oneself. Most people have bad self-knowledge. The truth is, if you can't get climax through yourself, you can't expect to have orgasm with someone else. There is a cultural saying that if a lover can't make you orgasm, he is probably a lousy lover; well, this is quite faulty and unfair. As women, we ought to be responsible for knowing our own sexuality. One of the rules of thumb that always work is that practice makes perfect. Stop be ashamed about masturbating, as it is the gateway to know your own body. When you are doing it, it is not only about achieving climax; it is more about identifying the process and remember every step in that path and then explain to your partner explicitly what to do to get you there.
Why confidence matters a lot
Many young women have low confidence, and it has nothing to do with physical attractiveness. In fact, many young and attractive girls have confidence issues. Being confident first means that you have to love your body and possess less shameful ideas about enjoying sex and pleasing yourself. Unfortunately, many young women, especially when raised in more conservative upbrings, have a mental blockage thinking that sex is obscene. I went through the same trouble in my 20s. First, I was not happy about how my body looks; thus, I was always nervous when naked in front of someone. Every time during a partnered sex, I was highly aware of my performance and obsessive about whether I was doing an excellent job for my partner. I also put my partner's needs above my needs, and the result was that even though I never faked an orgasm, I also never had one. Later in my 20s, I understood that only when you have confidence over yourself can you relax your mind, speak up your needs, tell your partner what you like, the sensitive locations, and the level of speed and pressure you want.
Enough foreplay is the key
We all know that it is much easier and faster for guys to be sexually aroused and ready for sexual engagement. Women, on the contrary, need more time in foreplay to be ready for intercourse. Foreplay activities such as kissing on sensitive spots, caress on the nipples, and direct stimulus on the clitoris will help women get ready. One of the most common reasons women fail to reach orgasm is that they don't spend enough time in foreplay and are thus not sexually prepared yet. Women's bodies go through complex changes when preparing for sex, and these changes help avoid pain during sex, increase pleasure, and chance of reaching orgasm. This whole process takes about 15 minutes.
Consider doing Kegels
Kegel exercise, also known as pelvic-floor exercise, involves repeatedly contracting and relaxing the muscles that form part of the pelvic floor. Though aerobic exercise such as running can probably make you look fitter, sexier and improve your stamina, Kegels is one of the few exercises that help strengthen pelvic floor muscles for both men and women. Strong pelvic floor muscles can lead to more intense orgasms for everyone. Kegel exercises can help people learn to relax these muscles during sex and have more enjoyable sexual experiences. If you have not heard about it yet, make sure to learn more about it from the internet.
It might seem farfetched to link meditation to better orgasm together, but we do know meditation has many benefits. For instance, it can be an excellent tool for stress-reducing and help you achieve deep rest, good sleep, and be more present. Therefore, it makes sense that meditation can increase sexual desire and performance by reducing cortisol and adrenaline levels. Modern life is so hectic. It is so easy for us to be stressed out and overwhelmed, one way or another, from severe pressures in work, challenging financial issues, ongoing obligations in our relationships and families, and many other reasons. Stress increases cortisol and adrenaline levels and can make it harder for women to orgasm and have erectile dysfunction.
The final note: reach out to a Sex Therapist
Though it is not the case with most women, however, if you really think something is probably wrong with you, you might have medical issues rather than just psychological problems, then you will have to be serious about it. Instead of being shy and feeling utterly helpless, it does not hurt to reach out to a doctor or sex therapist for some professional support.