Sometimes our sex lives can fall into a little rut. Whether you are in a long-term relationship or single – it happens. If you feel less interested or excited about sex and are looking for the “oomph” you once had, let me introduce you to sexual exploration.
Sexual exploration is all about trying new things and discovering what feels good, great, and toe-curling orgasmic!! You may be feeling less interested because you have become bored and have fallen into a stale sex routine. Fortunately, there are easy and fun ways to reignite your sexual fire.
Sexual exploration can be a solo, duo, trio, or group performance. The direction you want to head is entirely up to you. For now, let me be your sex-guide and take you on a journey through the ins and outs of sexual exploration. If this is unchartered territory for you, I will give you some tips to get started. We’ll start with just slightly stepping out of your comfort zone and build up to the more adventurous.
Travel a little south of your neighborhood
To use a travel analogy, this is like a walk in a new neighborhood. You know the city, but you’ve never walked these streets before. Many of us can get into a masturbation routine, and to start exploring your sexuality, you can start by mixing it up and getting out of your comfort zone.
Let’s start with your position. If you usually lay on your back in your bed, try getting on your knees, sitting on a chair, or standing up. The clitoris is a great places to hang out, but I recommend traveling south.
After spending some time touching your clitoris, and teasing your vaginal opening, keep traveling south, and you’ll reach your anus. Anal exploration is incredibly hot. It’s a primary erogenous zone that’s still a little “taboo.” Start with some spanking and pulling your cheeks apart to turn you on and relax you.
With anal penetration the difference between pleasure and pain is tension and lube. When you are relaxed, your anal sphincters will also relax. Also, unlike the vagina, your anus isn’t self-lubricating. Apply a generous amount of lube and lightly rub your anal opening and inner rim. You can gradually build up to inserting a finger. Continue to gently rub the outside and inside of your anal opening, and sliding inside. From this angle, you can stimulate your A-spot and experience an entirely new type of orgasm. Just remember, once you head south, you can’t head back up north (vagina) until you have thoroughly washed up. It’s a one-way street.
Stop just before reaching your destination
Really into the self-exploration? I have another technique for you… if you want to enhance your orgasm, you need to try edging. Edging is all about controlling your orgasm and making sure you don’t cum. Continue to stimulate yourself (in whatever way works for you) right to the brink of orgasm and then stop. Do it again, increasing speed and pressure until you are about to cum annnnnd then stop. Repeat this again and again. This drawn-out pleasure can increase the intensity, ending with a better O. It’s not everyone’s cup of tea, some swear by it, and others become frustrated. Instead of a full stop, you can do something different likely lightly pinch your clit or a light tug of your labia.
Travel to a new city
Now we’ll head to a whole new city and do some exploring with a partner and a tickle trunk of toys. Let’s start with vibrators. You or a partner can run a vibrator along your nipples, pubic area, labia, clitoris, vaginal opening, or around the anal opening. There is a lot to be said about dildos as well. With lots of lube and your dildo in hand, you are ready for some serious sexual exploration.
There are so many great dildos available – you can choose the size, color, vibration, and more. There are very realistic looking dildos that can look and feel just like the real thing. There are also unsuspecting printed ones and an array of colors. One of my favorites is my trusted Rabbit Vibrator because it can be used as a vibrator and a dildo. Plus, it's pink, and as Charlotte from Sex and the City said, “I thought it would be all scary and weird, but it isn’t! It’s pink, for girls!”. And if you want to take this exploration journey into the tub, no problem - it’s waterproof!
Travel to a new continent
As we continue our journey, we are now venturing into a new continent: the ultimate exploration – group sex. There are different sex clubs you can attend for some group fun. Every club will has their own rules, ensuring everyone’s safety and comfort, but it's basically like one big orgy. Singles and couples may attend to engage in sex acts with new people, have sex with each other in front of others, or watch others get it on.
You can engage in exhibitionism or voyeurism. You may have zero interest in traveling here, or it could be something that ignites a sexual fire you never knew you had in you. Right now,
many group activities are put on hold, but some clubs have gone virtual, with many people live-streaming their own exploration practices at home.
There is no beginning and end to sexual exploration. It’s a pleasurable practice to be enjoyed throughout your life. Sex therapists and researchers boast about the incredible benefits and its ability to spice up your sex life. If you are new to the idea of sexual exploration, you may want to ease in (both literally and metaphorically). Ordering sex toys online is a discreet way to purchase vibrators, dildos, and lube. With stay-at-home orders and lockdowns in place, sex toys are an exciting way to explore new heights of pleasure from the comfort and safety of your home. If you want to improve your sex life, it’s time to lube up and travel to where you’ve never been!