A lucky few of us have that one friend who’s absolutely in love with their butt plug and won’t shut up about it. But what about when you’re less certain? Why are butt plugs fun? Why should you try one? How do you use a butt plug for the first time anyway? Here’s why – and how – to get started with butt plugs.
Why Are Butt Plugs Fun?
The anus has its own collection of thousands of nerve endings that are stimulated while you use a butt plug or during rimming or anal sex. Plus, if you have a g-spot, a butt plug can stimulate it through the anterior wall of the vagina. If you have a prostate, a butt plug is a way to hit that magic orgasm button up inside your ass. Finally, a comfortable butt plug with a flared, safe base can be the sexual main event or stay in place by itself, leaving your hands free to go elsewhere. Alone, you can masturbate in a few different ways. Depending on the plug and how comfortable you are wearing it, you can even go clean the house. With a partner, you wearing a plug leaves you open to fucking or being fucked, spanking or being spanked, and more – with just a little extra kick.
I Feel Nervous About Butt Stuff! Are Butt Plugs Still For Me?
It’s okay to be nervous, and there’s no guarantee you’ll love butt plugs the first time you try them, the fifth time, or ever. Don’t think of them like your new forever sex toy; think of them like one item on a wide sexual menu. Sure, you could keep ordering your usual entrée – but it can also be fun to try something new.
I’m A Dude – Will Butt Stuff Make Me Gay?
Unfortunately, no. Anyone of any sexual orientation can be into butt stuff and it doesn’t mean anything about their sexual orientation – though we anecdotally find that men who are skilled at the communication, listening skills, and response that excellent partnered butt stuff requires are much better at other types of sex than those who aren’t.
How Do I Actually Masturbate With A Butt Plug For The First Time?
There are two important things to remember with any type of anal: go slower than you think you need to go, and use more lubricant than you think you need to use. Despite popular misconceptions, anal – whether with a butt plug, a dildo, a penis, or some fingers – isn’t supposed to hurt. If it does, it’s a sign that you need to adjust or slow down.
While some schools of thought suggest numbing lubes as part of anal prep, we recommend against them because they make it harder to connect with your body’s signals. Instead, use a thick lube that does not contain paraben, glycerin, or petroleum-based ingredients. If your sex toy is silicone, use a water-based lube to avoid wrecking the surface of the toy. If your sex toy is not silicone, a silicone lube can give you some extra cushion. (Avoid oil-based lubes.)
Finally, if you’re trying out a butt plug for the first time, and particularly if you’re feeling nervous – which is okay! – or some shame around it – which is also okay, but which is likely coming less from you and more from made-up social norms that it’s okay to release! – it might feel easier to do so alone, as we focus on here.
So you have a full bottle of lube and your charged butt plug standing by – what’s next?
Masturbate like you would without a butt plug first: One of the biggest challenges with butt stuff is relaxing enough to try it. Masturbating a little first can help you relax and get mentally receptive. Take some deep breaths and allow yourself to sink into your body.
Start with your fingers: Then put on a nitrile glove, lube up your fingers, and gently massage the outside of your asshole. When you’re ready, touch one fingertip to your anus and slowly bear down. At first, it might feel a little like you have to poop – when that’s the main association you have with a full rectum, it takes a second to adjust. Go slow and breathe deep. If and when you feel more relaxed, try adding a second finger.
Slowly insert the butt plug: When you’re ready, lube up the butt plug, using more lube than you think you need. Rest it against your anus and slowly apply gentle pressure. If you’re using a curved butt plug, like the rimming Tracy’s Dog Bob Vibe, position it so that when inserted the curve points towards your stomach. If you’re using a straight butt plug, like the Tracy’s Dog Anal Vibrator Butt Plug, just make sure the base is parallel to your ass crack. As you insert the butt plug a little resistance is okay, but if there’s a lot, ease off and go back to masturbating and using a finger or two until you’re more relaxed and ready to try again.
Hang out together: Once the butt plug is fully inside you, take a moment to get used to it. Try clenching and releasing your muscles around it. Any movement will feel intense, so keep going slow and use smaller motions. Try wiggling instead of thrusting. When you’re ready, turn on the lowest vibration setting and go from there! With their rimming-like rotating bases, vibrating tips, and range of vibration strengths and patterns, both the Tracy’s Dog Bob Vibe and the Tracy’s Dog Anal Vibrator Butt Plug will give you a lot to explore. (Just make sure not to touch other body parts with the fingers you had in your butt earlier.)
When you’re done: Removing a butt plug requires almost as much delicacy as inserting one. It also kind of feels like pooping. For this reason, you might be more comfortable heading to the bathroom to take it out. Take a few deep breaths, relax, and gently slide it out. Wash your butt plug and your hands in soap and warm water so next time you’re ready to play.